Are you a wedding guest? Bridesmaid? Bride? We've got three hard-to-navigate questions, answered.
The guest asks...
What is the rule on gifts at a destination wedding? I’ve already spent so much on a hotel and airfare!—Olga D., Chicago
Bad news first: “A gift is expected, no matter where the wedding is,” says New York City-based wedding designer Marcy Blum. The good news: Sticking to the lower end of the registry is A-OK, as is making a donation (even a small one) to a charity in their name.
The bride's friend asks...
How can I turn down an invitation to be a bridesmaid without jeopardizing our friendship?
—Jeanne E., Waverly, Iowa
“Why are you turning her down?” asks Washington Post advice columnist Carolyn Hax. “The answer to that question is everything. Figure out why you want to say no, then share your reason—or suck it up and say yes.”
The bride asks...
Do I have to let everyone bring a date?
—Ashley G., St. Louis
“Any couple—married, engaged, or living together—should both be invited,” says Lizzie Post, coauthor of the new, sixth edition of Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette. After that, it gets tricky. “Be consistent,” Post warns. “If you decide to invite even one pair who is ‘solid but not living together,’ you’ll need to apply that criterion to your entire guest list.”
—Lauren Waterman
Got any other wedding etiquette questions? Add them to the comments and we'll try to help you out!